When people still commuted to the office regularly a few years ago, I broke down while driving and listening to "Wolves" by Kanye West. While it's undeniable that the melancholy and off-kilter drums HIT, what made me cry a river was the ongoing police violence against Black people in the U.S.
Botham Jean was murdered in his own apartment by off-duty officer Amber Guyger, who mistook his home for hers. Despite being thousands of miles away in England, the flood of Black trauma I’d seen online, combined with the music I was listening to, left me deep in my feelings.
When I arrived at the office, composed myself, and started my day, I noticed no one was discussing what happened. As one of the only Black employees, I felt like the new kid arriving at school on their first day searching for a lunch table. Could my co-workers not relate to what I felt because these things didn't happen in England? I was physically present but mentally elsewhere, forced to mirror their indifference. Each smile or laugh felt like a mockery. It’s exhausting trying to make people care when they clearly don’t.
Now, following the senseless stabbings of three young girls on July 29, 2024 in Southport, England, the country is experiencing its worst race riots in years. Fueled by disinformation spread by far-right groups like the EDL and the general public, anti-immigration sentiment, Islamophobia, and domestic terrorism have surged. In scenes reminiscent of the 1970s and 1980s, many Black and Brown people are on self-imposed lockdowns to avoid violent white rioters who have clashed with police and physically and verbally assaulted innocent bystanders.
Earlier this week, I went into the office for a pre-arranged meeting. Nine days into the riots, there were no bulletins about avoiding certain areas, no safe spaces for impacted colleagues, and no mention of the ongoing domestic terrorism against Black and Brown people. The day proceeded as any other day, and it wasn't until my daughter texted me to make sure I remembered the tamarind sauce for the samosas that I realized the workday was done.
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